It's been awhile since we checked in on the Dauphin. Here's a look at his fancy website:
At the heart of Justin’s professional achievements – whether as a math and French teacher in British Columbia, or his leadership role in Katimavik, or even his strong defense of Quebec as a Member of Parliament – is deep respect for Canadians coast to coast to coast and his desire to serve them.
I'm guessing he taught New Math.
Justin's "deep respect" for Canadians does not seem to include conservatives, who are about a third of the population. Nor does it include the people of Alberta. The Justinian World View seems to be that if you're northwest of the French River, but east of the Rockies, you might as well break out the white sheets and pointed hats. I won't even bother mocking his thin resume, he does it himself. The man is in his early forties and he prominently lists a charity gig presiding over his father's old vanity project.
Let me take a moment here to plead with political copywriters. Please write like human beings. There are so many cliches in Justin's mini-bio I thought they were trying to sell deodorant in the 1980s. Justin Trudeau: Strong Enough For A Dipper, Soft Enough for a Liberal.
And who the hell gets paid for lines like this:
As a Parliamentarian, and prior to that, Justin travelled the country and met with Canadians in every region, consistently speaking about shared values, the importance of youth empowerment, protecting our wilderness, and living up to our place in the world.
He also thinks polar bears are cute. They haven't included that yet in the bio. No doubt an oversight. Even by the low standards of political marketing this is a yikes moment. Not to worry. If you're appalled by Justin's bio you'll be amused by the section entitled "Justin's Views." No it's not, as some cynical wags would suggest, a blank page or a 404 error. It's actually much worse than that:
I love this country and I want to serve it. I am running because I believe Canada wants and needs new leadership. The Conservative government is taking this country in a direction most Canadians don’t want it to go. We need a vision for our future grounded not in the politics of envy or mistrust. One that understands, despite all the blessings beneath our feet, that our greatest strength is above ground, in our people. A vision that pulls all Canadians together to build better lives for each other, a better Canada.
Again, who the hell writes this stuff? Is there anyone in Canada who seriously says they're advocating for "the politics of envy or mistrust." The Conservatives are taking Canada in a direction most Canadians don't want. How do you know? The Tories have won three straight national elections. That's three more than your party has won in the last little while. This has been a recurring theme with the Left since 2006. Despite having clearly lost they keep insisting that, contrary to the electoral evidence, the Prime Minister is some sort of usurper. This was the logic behind the Grand Coalition of December 2008.
Remember how that worked out?
This is who the Liberals are entrusting their fate to. A man who speaks and campaigns in political cliches so obviously most real politicians stopped using them years ago. If political hack was a profession, one trembles at the possible accreditation process, the governing body would have to strike off anyone that sells a line like: "our greatest strength is above ground, in our people."
I like lollipops! I like puppies! I like sunsets! Hugs for everyone!
The success of Justin Trudeau is terrifying on many levels. That a major political party would consider such an empty suit a potential leader is disturbing. That this same party ruled Canada for most of the twentieth century has implications I'd like not to explore this early in the morning. Somewhere the ghosts of Laurier, King and St. Laurent are unquiet this day. And with very good reason.